On leaving...

Santa Cruz is named Saint's Crossing
And indeed my time here has been both Blessed and brief.
I wonder if there will ever be any aspect of "forever" in my life at all; and
At the same time, as I watch the false Idols I've held close to me
Drift back into their prospective places
on the horizon....I see that
There are in fact Truths still in tact. They bear little resemblance
to my expectations, and I am endlessly grateful for that.
Indeed--my life is an exercise in disillusionment.
And my present work is to strip down
to the essential core of my existence...
It is about integrity...
I feel as though I needed to Play for several years... but
Now it is time for work. Soon enough, if all goes according to my
virtually unwritten "plan"-- those two facets of life will integrate more evenly.
And so I leave this place, not with the pain and tears i brought here,
but by the light that I've discovered
within myself
which is beginning to guide me along my way...
I follow, despite the cries of concerned Others
That I must wade around a bit longer in life up to my ankles
Rather than closing my eyes and simply
Jumping in. Hear me: I will check for sharks
And shallow boulders...but
Know that I will jump...